I changed this old saying just a tad: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
The thought was sparked by a friend posting a comment on facebook about the fact that she missed having people stop in for coffee and conversation like they used to in other places she had lived. I responded by asking her why she didn’t do it herself. Why was she waiting for someone to come to her? I also proffered the thought that whatever reasons she might have for not dropping into the homes of others may be the same reasons others have for not dropping into to visit her.
It’s so easy to say, “Why doesn’t anybody…?” “Why is it that no one…?”
Aren’t you part of the ‘anybody’ and the ‘no ones?’ If it is something you would like to see happen, then what is stopping you from doing it?
As I’ve mentioned before, I am an introvert. That doesn’t mean I’m not interested in spending time with people or getting to know them. It just means that when I do, I prefer it to be on a one-to-one level. And because I’m an intuitive, deep feeling type of introvert, it means that I may not be interested in surface talk like where you work and live. I’ll want to get right to the core of the things you are passionate about.
Because of this, when I want to get to know someone a little better, I’ll generally invite them out for coffee or lunch. I don’t sit around wishing they’d invite me. Did you know that an introvert can be both shy and bold? That’s me.
The funny thing about this is that many of us sit around wishing someone would… call, come over, invite… not realizing that many others are sitting at home wishing the same thing.
No not all them. Some of them you’ll call and they’ll be busy or not interested or forget. Don’t let that put you off. Call someone else or try again at another time.
One time when I invited a lady to join me for lunch after church, she looked so shocked. “It’s been at least three years since anyone invited to lunch or coffee with them,” she said. I had no idea. She seemed to have plenty of friends around her all the time.
Do unto others as want them to do for you, instead of waiting around for it to just happen. Become the ‘anyone’ who IS doing it. Whatever that ‘it’ may be.
What have you been wanting someone else to do that you can turn around and do for someone else?