Do you know someone who seems to always be giving of themselves to others? They volunteer their time. They give encouraging words. They take time to listen to people who are hurting. It just comes natural to them.
Do you want them to stop giving so much all the time?
Here’s a sure fire way to get them stop giving so much of themselves to at least one person —
start complaining about their giving of themselves and their time to others.
Then complain about how little they give of their time and energy to you.
They will immediately lose their desire to give… to YOU.
Isn’t that great?
You’ll have removed one person off their list of people who can benefit from their time and caring.
You see, demanding a person give to you makes it no longer a gift. It makes it a chore, an obligation.
As to getting them to give less to others and more to you…I have no solution for you there. Take one person off the list and they’ll just give more to others.
But…if you really want more time with them, you might consider joining them in the giving. You might find that you get as much joy out of it as they do. But maybe not.
Maybe that’s just not your thing. And that’s okay. Everyone is different and is drawn to contributing to others in different ways. Accept that. Give in your own way and let the givers in your life do what they do best – give and serve freely, not ‘on demand.’
(PS Yes, I do know that givers can get their priorities out of balance, but a genuine appeal to reason and balance will be much more affective than trying to insist upon being the prime recipient of their giving.)
What do you think?